Chapter One: Who Is This Person and Why Is He Talking to My Dog

My name is Michael, and people started calling me Dolittle a couple of years ago. I took it as the best compliment I have ever received. The Dolittle philosophy is simple: every animal deserves to be understood before they are managed.Every dog has a personality, opinions, preferences, and a backstory. You already know this even if you have never said it out loud to anyone. You can say it to me.I am not going to bark orders. Me and your dog are going to have a good hang.Before this gig I was a flight attendant and a red carpet photographer and a photo stylist and a personal assistant and a waiter and a salesperson at Neiman Marcus and about twelve other things. I am also a writer and a visual artist. I pull from every single one of those backgrounds when I care for your dog and when I talk with you about them.Let's have a real conversation about your dog before we even have the meet & greet. This is not a rushed transaction. I want to know what makes them tick and I want it to be easy like Sunday morning for all of us.I will dote on your dog like a little baby and if that means putting them over my shoulder and burping them I will do that too without a second thought. A little spit-up never hurt anyone.I do room sits and walks for dogs staying at the Four Seasons and the Park Hyatt. I am insured and vetted.And you may already know my colleague, Poppins. Some call her Scary Mary. She has a flair for the dramatics and sensible shoes. Poppins lives....well some might say that where she lives is none of your beeswax. Say, do you remember the old woman who lived in a shoe? Turns out she lost her rent control sitch and now she lives in my building. BTW, she's real and sometimes comes by with baklava. See Chapter Three.P.S. The playing card is the work of Art of Pants.

• The Things We Do Together
• Poppins
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Chapter Two: The Things We Do Together

Walks and drop-ins run roughly a dollar a minute. Boarding in my home is roughly a hundred dollars per day. When I am coming to you whether that is your home or a hotel the rate reflects the difference. Everything else is like the chalkboard special at a good restaurant. It changes. It depends. Call and we will figure it out together.I will work with you. I never want finances to be the reason you did not reach out.WalkingEvery walk is its own thing. Some dogs want to cover ground. Some want to inspect every single flower box on Astor Street and that is completely valid. I talk to them the whole time because why have a chore when you can have an adventure.Boarding in My HomeYour dog has full run of the place. On the furniture on the bed wherever they feel most at home. Nothing here is precious except the dog.My home is impeccably clean and it smells like a home because it is one. Poppins sees to that personally.When I can take a dog on an errand I take them. If your dog vibes with the grocery store we are going to the grocery store. Some ride in a papoose some prefer the stroller some want to walk proudly beside me like they are running for mayor. We go with the flow.One thing I’ve learned from veterinarians over the years is that Trazodone can make the transition into boarding, house sitting, or hotel stays dramatically easier for anxious dogs. There is no judgment attached to that; it is simply another tool for helping a dog feel safe.The one place I cannot take them is the theater. I volunteer with the Saints of Chicago and occasionally those commitments are already booked when you book. I am never out more than four hours and the Ring camera is always on. I am not out socializing while your dog sits home alone. That is just not something I do.Drop In Visits
A check in. Fresh water. Feeding if needed. Some company. A small thing that makes a big difference.Extended Enrichment ExperiencesSome dogs want a real outing. The beach. A long meander through somewhere new. I talk to them the whole way because dogs are genuinely delighted when you treat them like a full participant in the adventure.Hotel and In Room CareI know how these environments work. I coordinate with the concierge I bring my own leash and my own bags and I know the good grassy spots nearby.Reactive DogsRemember on The Good Place when the yellow and black zigzag outfits started appearing and the sinkholes opened up? Reactivity is like that. It looks like chaos on the outside. Underneath it is just fear sending signals that something is wrong. A reactive dog is not a bad dog. I take them seriously and carefully and I have a lot of patience for the zigzag. The one situation I cannot work with is a dog that is genuinely dangerous to people. Everything else is a conversation.PuppiesWonderful. Exhausting. Teeth like tiny knives. A puppy requires constant attention in a way that a grown dog simply does not. They might sleep for an hour or they might sleep for fifteen minutes and that is just the nature of the situation. In many ways, it is like caring for a real infant. The puppy rate? Usually time and a half covers it, but we'll figure out a number that works for both of us.Constant CareSome dogs need more than walks and company. Mobility assistance, ongoing medical monitoring, and around-the-clock supervision are a different level of service entirely and the rate reflects that. Reach out and we will figure out what works.Your Dog's SoundtrackI make little films from our time together. Not surveillance footage. Tiny music videos. Sometimes your dog gets Taylor Swift. Sometimes Miles Davis. Sometimes whatever song finds us halfway through the walk. If you have requests tell me. I love requests. Every dog has a soundtrack.How We TalkThere is no right way to communicate with me. Some people send novels. Some send voice memos. Some text all day. Some prefer the phone. I love all of it. The more I know the better I can care for your dog. Communication is not extra. It is part of the service.The Rainbow BridgeI offer end of life care for dogs and their families. I will sit with your dog at home during the final days. I will go to the vet with you when it is time. I will stay through it as needed. This is for your dog and it is for you. From the first difficult conversation to the last goodbye I will be there for both of you.Some would call this role a death doula. That is exactly what it is.This is not a service I take lightly and it is not one I will ever treat as routine. Every dog deserves to be held by someone who means it.Reach out and we will talk about what you need.

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Chapter Three: A Word From Poppins

You are not speaking with Michael right now.Poppins Clears Her ThroatDo not leave Michael in a jam. If you booked two months out and cancel two days before you owe fifty percent of the rate. Dolittle forgives. Poppins does not forget. I will be checking in. I live right upstairs. (In Michael's imagination. But do not let that comfort you.)Poppins Raises an EyebrowIf your dog has medical or special needs please disclose that before booking. The scope of care and the rate will be discussed accordingly. Poppins does not look kindly upon surprises of this nature. Don't fuss with us, fellas.Poppins Consults Her LedgerLast minute bookings are welcome when there is availability. There may be an expedited booking fee if things need to be rearranged. We will talk about it.Poppins Approves of ZelleClean. Simple. No fuss. Very on brand.Payment is expected in full just prior to the start of service. Michael will send you a Zelle request. Poppin's loves a tidy ledger.Please note: While Poppins and Michael do not agree on everything, we both agree completely that dogs are better than people.Poppins has left the building.

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